[XOTM] One Must Imagine a Lab-grown Xero Happy

Summary: Tessle meets a very ordinary Xero. Or so he assumes.

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It really was an ordinary day, one would think.

The Harbor was bathed in midday sunlight, boasting its colors in perfect match with the ocean, and the inside of Tessle’s workshop was just the right temperature, a rare occurrence with the wind currents traveling over the ocean just beyond the beige waterproofed fabric.

The work he was doing here today was definitely incredibly fun and intriguing to him in particular, but, admittedly, a common task these days, too — he’d been looking at fossils gathered in different parts of Owai-6, the ones all the official institutes had enough of that one could simply carry them around, the ones that children playing at the beach were practically tripping over and rock skipping with. There was always a chance that one of these could reveal some rare subspecies, or some new way of survival, and oh wouldn’t it just be neat to be the one to find such a specimen? And even if not that, seeing familiar patterns in the fossilized biology was a fun little rollercoaster every time.

Even so, it was, at the moment, routine. And it would be interrupted by a stranger, pushing aside one flap of the entrance quietly enough that Tessle, sitting at his workbench, didn’t hear anything.

“I heard that you’re an inventor?”

Tessle would later readily and with a slightly embarrassed chuckle admit that that single sentence was really all it took for his interest to be piqued. He was an inventor! And anyone asking about it obviously had some interest, and Tessle was always delighted to share what he knew with other folks! Shared knowledge was awesome!!

“Sure am,” he grinned. “Who’s asking, if I may?”

The Xero in his tent, too, seemed completely ordinary. A light red and pink, looking like a sandstone pillar in the midst of a mesa, with stark, pale blue eyes and a strangely anxious stance. Surely, Tessle wasn’t that intimidating, right? Sure, one or two times he’d had to explain that the broken horn wasn’t from some horrible brawl but instead a very intense dance-off, and maybe the pointy, jagged tail-tip gave off the vibe of a two-pronged electrified fork, but usually, the bounce in his step and the general friendliness would off-set it.

“Rad Red, or just Rad. It/its.”

“Tessle,” he nodded as a way of greeting, offering the other a paw to shake. “He/him.”

Rad, still visibly hesitant, shook his paw, and said nothing for long enough to make it awkward. Luckily, Tessle could make enough conversation for two any day.

“So! Rad Red with a rad name! What brings you to my corner of Aluriza?”

Rad tilted its head, like it was reconsidering even coming in here, and for a moment, Tessle thought he might be asked to do something illegal. Somehow, the question Rad gave him was stranger.

“Could you - hypothetically - build prosthetics?”

“Prosthetics?” Tessle gave the other Xero a more thorough look. It was not missing any limbs. “For what? I hope you’re not planning to lose an arm,” he joked.

“Not at all,” it shook its head. “I’m planning to gain an arm. As many as I can, in fact.”

Tessle raised a brow in confusion.

“Legs, too, actually,” Rad continued. “And eyes– those don’t even have to be very elaborate, actually, just like, you ever built anything for cosplay? Oh, and wings, if you can figure that out. Maybe tails?”

“Sorry, hold on,” Tessle interrupted. “What are you talking about?”

The red Xero paused, re-focusing on Tessle. With a fully serious expression, it then says: “I’m trying to get as many traits as possible, but I’m hoping to do it in the cheapest possible way.”

…what???

“That does not clear things up in the slightest,” Tessle shook his head. “Are you just trying to get Glitched? ‘Cause you gotta go to the Curator for that, you know.”

The expression on Rad’s face twisted a little, but it shook its head: “That’s not what I’m doing. I’m just trying to add fake stuff, not real biological stuff! You know, like a hoodie with extra antennae on it! It’s not really a part of your body, just a funky addition on top!”

Made a bit more sense, then. But.. why would someone go to a guy with an engineering degree for that? “And you’re trying to enlist my help with your cosplay?”

“It’s not really a cosplay! I’m just– I’m,” Rad Red broke eye contact. “I’m just trying to be everything I can be. That’s why I want them to be functional. So I can use them, and become something more. Can you do that or not?”

Tessle’s snout scrunched up a little as he considered what that could possibly mean. He still wasn’t entirely sure why it was such an issue to just go and get some Glitched traits if it really wanted to change form like that. Maybe some personal beliefs? Folks had different habits and boundaries all over the world, after all…

Again, later on, Tessle would, this time without laughing, admit that despite his doubts, he WAS curious. He’d never made cybernetic limbs before. And they would have to connect to the nervous system somehow, in order to receive commands from the brain and function right. And they would have to be light enough to not damage a Xero’s bone structure but sturdy enough to be able to lift things or walk. This was not a replacement, this was an extra addition.

“You know what?” Tessle smiled, excited. “I’m not sure if I can do it. So, obviously, I’ve got to try.”

Rad Red’s face split in a thrilled, gleeful grin. “Really??”

“Yup!” The yellow Xero gestured for Rad to follow him out of the workshop and into the neighboring warehouse. They would have to work with much heavier machinery for this, after all. “Let’s see if we can make you some new body parts!”

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The Xero had offered Tessle money, and Tessle declined the offer, instead offering for Rad Red to assist him in his work as a means of payoff. Firstly, he did projects like these for fun, for the new discoveries along the way, and to help folks in need. Secondly, Rad Red was rather low on funds. Taking its few hundred Prestige would honestly feel like a robbery. It made Tessle wonder how this guy was even getting by.

“I mostly scavenge,” Rad had shared with him while watching him shape out a 3D model on his laptop. “Not a lotta folks venture deep into Kubai, but there is a lot of trash buried in the sand, and sometimes it happens to be something I can sell.”

Tessle paused. “Kubai. The desert?”

Rad Red tilted its head, antennae and ears flopping to the side. “Yea?”

“You came all the way here. From the Kubai desert. Where you live?”

“Yea..?”

“Why?” Tessle’s brows were furrowed as he stopped his work completely. Sure, he was good, but was he really “a guy living off of scraps crossed an ocean for your expertise” good??

Rad Red avoided eye contact. It seemed to do that a lot. “I don’t really know who to go to for this stuff. But I found a book on cybernetics crediting your work as a source, so I figured.. might as well try someone clearly qualified, right?”

Ah, someone was citing him in their books? Wild. Maybe Tessle was “cross the ocean for you” worthy, then? But he was fairly certain the only work that could’ve been cited was a deep-sea long range life signs tracker for divers and their team on the surface. Not exactly the same kind of technology.

“Plus, um.” Rad shrugged. “I read your work. And you seemed really nice. So. I figured even if you turned me down, you wouldn’t be a jerk about it.”

Aw, well that was nice. “I mean, I guess I’m pretty chill,” Tessle preened a little. He was proud of his easy going nature! It got him some great friends, and it made working with other researches much less of a hassle. More importantly, though… “So you read about my diver tracker, then?”

“Oh, yeah!!” Rad nodded, “I understood like half of it, though. I have no idea what any of the technical terms mean.”

“Hah! Yeah, that’s fair. I can totally elaborate, if you want?”

He was thrilled when Rad nodded again, and settled back into 3D modeling while ranting about his project, explaining the process to his tiny audience of one.

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There was an old radio in the workshop.

Tessle had found it by chance in an antique shop ages ago and decided that it would look awesome in his workshop, and it did. The sound from it was awful, staticky and sometimes muffled, sounding like it was buried underground, but it nevertheless added some fun flavor to his workspace. To Tessle, it was like old spaceships – they were janky, and not very elegant, but they had character. Most old things did, and this one could play music, which was just an overall win in Tessle’s book.

“Alright, first prototype, here we go,” Tessle hummed, pressing the power button on the industrial rate 3D printer that he definitely didn’t forget to return to the Torini Weather Centre half a year back. As the machine got to work, he walked over and twisted the dial on the old blocky radio, making it crackle to life. “How about some music while we wait? You got a preference?”

Rad shrugged, fascinated by the slow progress of the printer as it layered carbon fibre on top of itself, circling in a strange shifting shape to eventually make something recognizable. “Anything with a loud beat is good, I guess.”

“Right on!” the yellow Xero nodded, fiddling with the radio’s antenna until the sound lost most of the static and started playing.

As the old radio blasted music, Tessle took a step to the side, and then a step back. And then again, and again, following the rhythm, a silly little jig as he waited for the printer to finish the prototype. His tail, balancing out his weight, moved behind him with a quiet swish–swish–swish, and then changing it up for a swoosh as he turned around to join Rad and watch the printer do its work.

Except – Rad Red was no longer interested in the printer. Instead, it was staring – quite intently – at Tessle’s tail. Blue eyes followed as the tail moved, swish–swish–swish, at least until Tessle awkwardly twisted it behind his back. “Sorry, did I accidentally bump into you? I’m usually really careful about not hitting someone with this thing.”

“Huh?” Red and pink ears perked up as Rad refocused on Tessle’s face. “Oh! No, you’re fine. Your tail is just really cool, is all.”

“Thanks..?”

“You think you could make one like that?”

For reasons Tessle couldn’t entirely articulate, the question made his stomach drop. “Uh. Maybe? Maybe not this exact one. I’m quite fond of it, you know?”

“Oh, haha, right. Of course.”

There was the awkward silence again, making a comeback as strong as ever, but Tessle would not let it sit, no way. “Anyways! Impromptu dance party? Waiting-for-the-printer Dance? Surely you won’t let me bring all the moves myself, right?”

Rad chuckled a little, watching him begin to bounce to the rhythm again. Step to the side, another step back, with a tail going swish–swish–swish to the staticky beat on the radio. “I’m not really a dancing guy.”

“Eh, it’s not about being good at it,” Tessle shrugged. “It’s just about shaking off whatever ails you! Like,” he gestured, “waiting for a project to get done!”

“Hm.” Rad huffed, and then mimicked Tessle’s movement. It was heavier on its feet, clearly accustomed to holding its own running over burning sand or climbing over boulders hollowed out by hot winds, and its center of gravity was a bit higher than Tessle’s, and it showed as Rad stopped mirroring Tessle and started feeling out the beat on his own.

“Yeah, there you go!” Tessle whooped, and Rad laughed in response, properly, happily laughed.

And there it was – it almost felt ordinary again.

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The results were… disappointing. Sure, Tessle could build artificial limbs. And sure, he could give Rad maybe an extra pair of arms, but more than that and things got… complicated. A body built for two legs, two arms, two eyes, naturally struggled with focusing on any more body parts than it was supposed to have. That was, after all, why these additions would normally require a Glitch Card – a Xero’s XNA needed to be picked apart, adjusted, prepared to handle the way it was supposed to be built.

He explained as much to Rad when it had trouble with two cybernetic arms. He reminded it again when it insisted on testing out a tail (which, for the record, did not look like Tessle’s – it was barely more than a carbon fibre tube). And yet, technically, the additions sort of kind of worked, and maybe that was why every time, Tessle would eventually crack and agree to try and make more. So what if Rad could only move one tail at a time? Its proper, real tail, was fluffy and short, it wasn’t really like it had much versatility to begin with. So what if Rad could only focus on two arms at a time, surely it could gain skill through practice.

Though, if the hurdles could all be overcome, Tessle had to wonder – why wasn’t everyone doing this in the first place? Why were people applying for Glitch Cards if anyone could simply waltz into a random scientist’s workshop and make themselves whatever they wanted? Sure, these weren’t biological additions, but plenty of folks used the card to make adjustment to prosthetics easier, too. A Glitched body adapted easier, but was that truly the only way?

His answer came in the most horrific way imaginable one day when they decided to add a second pair or artificial arms, giving Rad six arms total. It had to walk on all four – eight? – instead of walking upright, the weight keeping it down, but for a moment, it seemed that Rad had caught its rhythm, moving all eight limbs, even running a small circle around Tessle at one point.

“I think you did it!!” Rad Red proclaimed, big toothy grin splitting its face.

And then it collapsed to the ground.

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It was fine. It was just fatigue, apparently – Rad had tried to function with so many additions that its brain simply ran out of battery and forcibly knocked it out.

Still, the experience of waiting for an ambulance with an unconscious Xero in his arms, artificial limbs twitching and foam forming at its mouth, was not one Tessle ever wanted to have again if he could help it. And it haunted him that he caused it to occur in the first place.

He paced around in the Harbor Hospital’s hallways while Rad recovered, thinking about the last few weeks, about what they’ve figured out, about the limitations. And, eventually, Tessle came to the only possible conclusion.

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“I’m done.”

“Wh- what?? But– but, Tessle, I thought you wanted a challenge!”

“A fun challenge!” Tessle countered, and as childish as it might have sounded, that was what it was! He liked discoveries, yes, but not ones that left his friends unconscious and foaming at the mouth. “I’m not down to figure this stuff out at the cost of your health, Rad. No way.”

They stood on the balcony of the hospital room where Rad had been staying for the last two days. It was fine, the doctors said. It could go home tomorrow. Tessle agreed - Rad really should go home, and he told it as much. When the other Xero looked at him with a deeply wounded expression, Tessle felt a little sorry, but mostly he felt like that was an unfair reaction. What they’d been doing here, it was reckless and dangerous. It was not worth it.

For a second, it looked like Rad would argue, but then it just sighed: “...yeah. Alright.”

It sat on the floor of the balcony, hands in its lap and snout turned downwards.

Tessle sat next to it. The evening air made the floor a little cold, but not enough to be uncomfortable just yet.

“...I’m sorry it didn’t work, for the record,” he admitted after a moment. “I think if it had, that would’ve been really cool. You could just hoard all the traits. Like an Everything Bagel, but a Xero.”

Rad Red let out a small huff. “An Everything Xero. That’s kinda sick, yeah.”

Seagulls squealed and yelled in the distance. The wind picked up a little bit. The stars started blinking into existence in the sky above and in the water below.

“I would do it properly, too,” Rad hummed, looking out at the ocean. The Moon reflected in the water, and in its eyes, too. “Biologically, I mean. With a Glitch Card, like people do sometimes.”

Tessle didn’t ask why Rad hadn’t done that yet. He’d gotten his paws on Astatine once or twice in his excessive studies, a gifted box from a professor, a temporarily borrowed vial from a senior colleague. The rich and the lucky and the ones in professional scientific fields traded with Astatine. Plus… “‘Astatine is an exceptionally rare element that is very unstable and difficult to find; it doesn't stick around for long,’” he quoted the most well-known definition, the one every Xero who wasn’t living under a rock full-time knew.

Rad nodded. “I’ve dug up a loootta crap in the desert. Not really lucky with the ay-tee, though, you can probably imagine.” It sighed. “So I’m hunting any other way I can become… me.”

“Hm.” That didn’t sound right. Something about that, to Tessle, was wrong. How many legs or how many eyes or how many ears you had didn’t make you You. Many other things defined Xeros — their old and new traditions. Their ability to thrive in a world after their world. Their narrowly avoided extinction. Though, perhaps, that last one was proving Rad right, in a sense. They’d died out once before, and now their evolution was partly artificial. Was then the artificiality not something that HAD to define them? Would Tessle be Tessle without the horns, without the two-pronged tail, without the blazing yellows and brilliant blues? Would he like music as much if his tail didn’t affect his center of balance, didn’t add extra weight that was fun to swing around to a rhythm?

Tessle frowned. No, that wasn’t right at all. “I think you can be you without a hundred extra arms,” he said. “No matter what your XNA is built of. Maybe a different one, maybe one with two arms and two legs, but a real one. A free one. A living one.” He looks over at Rad, and Rad looked back at him. “You know?”

Cold blue eyes regarded him with an expression he couldn’t decipher in the darkness of the midnight shore. Rad didn’t say anything. It would leave the day after, and it would send Tessle a postcard depicting red and pink sandstone pillars of a mesa in the Kubai desert saying that it found another fossil.

But for now, the night was beautiful, and it was ordinary.